Today’s Quote: It’s not personal, Sonny. It’s strictly business. – Michael Corleone
Welcome to another episode of the podcast that teaches you how to be a ridiculously good virtual assistant.
Today we are going to talk about business.
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Connect with Tracey D’Aviero, VA Coach and Trainer
Episode Notes:
You have probably heard me say more than once that business is business, it’s not personal.
Michael Corleone said it in The Godfather series and I agree.
When we let our emotions dictate business decisions or communications or boundaries, we can be heading for problems.
Is there a place for being personal? Sure there is. We’ll talk a bit more about that later.
But right now I want to talk about some of the times that it is important to keep business in mind.
Virtual Assistants often mistake a client making a business decision, or saying something they don’t like, or questioning something they have said or done as a personal insult.
Especially as we progress into our relationship with our clients, we get to know each other a bit better.
We might relax some of the things that we initially set up, and then we feel like we are being taken advantage of.
It’s these times that I want to address in this episode.
Boundaries
We set boundaries in place for a reason. it is to make sure that both you and your client have their expectations set about how you work together.
The more access you give a client, the more they will want, or use. The faster you respond to them, the faster they will expect your next response to be.
If you let your clients step on or cross your boundaries once, they will push them again. They may not even intend to – but you will have blurred their expectations.
And it happens very quickly that we then get frustrated with those clients, and it feels like they might be taking advantage of us.
You must reiterate the boundaries and hold to them in order for the clients expectations to be managed properly. Most clients aren’t trying to annoy us, but they do so when they think something is not a big deal.
I had a client for 7 years and she knew I started work at 9:30 every morning. My husband had some commitments in a particular week and so I was getting an early start because we needed to be out in the afternoon. So I replied to one of her emails at 7 am. ONE day I did this. The next day she sent me an email at 7 am and asked me to schedule it to go out at 9 am. When I said no, she said well yesterday you responded to me at 7 am, so I thought you were working early. After 7 years of working together, the expectation became blurred.
Me saying no to the ‘request’ was resetting the boundary. But the client took it personally because we were close. I took it personally because my schedule was being changed due to my personal commitments. But the bottom line was it was a business request – and neither one of us should have taken it personally to be asked or denied.
Incidentally, I have never emailed another client outside of business hours since then. Gmail scheduling for the win!
Communication
Communication is one of the biggest areas that get misinterpreted between a VA and a client.
A brief email that causes a misunderstanding or error. A million texts when you don’t really use it as a communication method, but you answered your client once that way so now they prefer it.
The words we use to communicate with our clients, and they with us, often are the biggest source of us feeling personally affected. Someone is curt, or cold, or brief, or even angry.
Email sucks at times like this, let’s face it. And if someone is not a good communicator, that can cause a lot of stress in a business relationship.
Is it you? If you constantly have to ask for clarification on things, you may begin to think it’s you. Often it’s not. A busy client may not be able to articulate what they need because they think you can.
Your communication methods are key as well – you need to make sure that the client uses your preferred methods, not theirs.
I once had a client send me 83 emails over the weekend. She would pop an email off to me when she thought of something she wanted me to do. And some of the emails were her changing her mind on something she had previously sent. This particular Monday morning I lost it when I saw my inbox. I couldn’t believe she had wasted so much of my time. I addressed it with her that day – she had NO idea she had sent so many (how? who knows) and was genuinely shocked – I let her go anyway.
You must find a way for your client to communicate the proper information to you for every project so you can correct this and move on. Whether that is a project management task request, or a google form – get the details you need and eliminate unnecessary back and forth. It’s one of the biggest culprits of the business versus personal argument.
Money
When a client questions your invoice, or the work you say you have done, this can definitely be a time to think it’s a personal attack on you – you’re not dishonest or untrustworthy.
And so when clients question things, we can jump to the defensive. What you should actually do is try to figure out why the client is asking you for such detail or clarification.
Did something take longer than they expected? If so, why was the anticipated time not communicated at the start of the project? With VAs, time is money. All tasks should be assigned an estimated time to complete.
I have worked with VAs who didn’t work nearly as quickly as I did. Often in corporate jobs, we aren’t worried about how long it takes to do something – but as VAs we need to be. Working efficiently and quickly is the name of the game.
People do work different ways – work pace is so important – but you are always working with the clients money.
I have always set a limit of 2 hours for ANYTHING I do for a client before checking in with them about it. Research especially is important. I have seen VAs go down huge rabbit holes claiming they needed to – and charging 10 hours to a client for some simple research.
So these are the reasons that YOUR client might be questioning you – because they have been burned by money before.
Now of course many time the client is the wrong one – they think something shouldn’t take as long as it did – and it does. It’s hard not to lay blame, but this is where some really solid procedures come in handy.
You need to be sure that the client understands what you can do in their estimated time each month, and that you are always communicating that clearly. If you are doing something for the first time, or starting to work with a new client, make sure you give them estimates so they have some idea.
And always keep them up to date on how much of their budget you have used per month. It’s a professional way of handling their money that they will appreciate, and they will build trust with you much sooner – no more nickeling and diming!
Deadlines and Availability
Your client’s lack of planning doesn’t make anything an emergency for you.
Everything you do should have a deadline set for completion- and proper lead time associated with it.
I used to have a client that I billed 1 hour to send out their weekly newsletter. The newsletter was to be sent out at 11 am on Thursdays. I would very often receive the newsletter at 10 am Thursdays. Their reasoning was that I only needed an hour to do it, and that I knew it had to be sent out at 11, so I should be able to get it done.
How cocky that sounds! But it was really just a miscommunication – and a fractured deadline and lead time process.
We needed to have a discussion about scheduling and buffer times for things like editing, approval, creating images, and so on.
Maybe I billed them an hour for the newsletter, but maybe I created my images on Tuesdays, and they had missed that deadline. Maybe I wanted to send them the draft on Wednesday, so they had time to send edits and then I only needed 15 minutes on Thursday morning at 8 am to schedule it to go out on time. But without the actual content for the week, those things were impossible.
And so I, begrudgingly, actually blocked out that hour in my calendar, expecting it – and did it last minute for months. Until I just didn’t. I decided to discuss it with them and let them know I needed more lead time.
It was eye opening for them and we fixed it immediately after our discussion, but this was after months of me rushing at the last minute. I felt they were taking advantage of me, and they had no idea they were, or at least that was their story they stuck to!
I also had another client who I told I needed at 24 hours notice for every work request so I could schedule her work properly into my calendar. She would literally send me everything 24 hours ahead. Wednesday at 4 pm delivery of pieces, please schedule it for Thursday at 4 pm. Some people are quite literal – it’s not personal at all.
Task List
And finally, the things you do for people. Scope creep is a big thing that falls under business not being personal.
You don’t want to say no so you say yes, but you really don’t want to. You hold it again the client because you feel like their yes man. And you are!
But once again, much of the time this is because you haven’t clarified where your scope of work starts and ends. If you do this, and hold to it, you won’t be the yes man (or woman).
Now, sometimes we have clients who think we SHOULD be doing everything they ask. If they have ever had an assistant, that could be why. Or they could just be a jerk. Either way, it’s not personal – they are conducting business.
I had lots of clients who just kept piling things onto my desk. Most of the time I kept on going with it, and many times I was not happy about it. But when I learned to define and hold my scope of work in place, things became so much easier.
So then when we say no, it’s the client who then takes it personally. They need help, they don’t have anyone else, and they feel slighted. It happens!
And it’s their turn to not take their business personally. It’s just time to find someone else to do that particular task. Really simple: That’s not something I do. Let’s find someone else to do that.
I had a client once who was located in California. I told her we could work together because our work days would overlap. At 1 pm my time, it was her morning. So she didn’t need to feel like she would never hear from me. She misunderstood and decided that every day at 1 pm we would work ‘together’. Nope. That was a big one I had to correct fast.
Anyway you can see what I’m getting at here.
A lot of times we feel like someone is insulting us or taking advantage of us, or judging us, and it’s really not that way at all.
It’s important to take a few steps back and look at the facts.
This can be hard to see on your own- if you have a trusted colleague or community that you can check in with, it’s easier to get some support. Not the VAs groups with clients in them though!
And the more you do it, the more you will build that muscle.
No one is trying to upset you – most of the time – they are just trying to trudge through their business the same way you are.
When you make sure you address the issue, you can fix it.
Or you will realize that the client is not a good fit for you.
Either way, it’s still not personal, it’s business.
I agree, the saying itself is quite trite. But the more you learn to work with it the better you can handle things that don’t go quite the way you expected them to.
Now when should you get personal in business?
When you are beginning to build a relationship with your client. You are building trust with them and vice versa.
When you are moving towards goals. Everything you do in business will get you what you want in your personal life. That’s definitely personal.
When you are writing or collecting testimonials. Those are all about feelings.
When you are creating content for your website or your social media. People are buying YOU as a service provider, and a quick way for them to know whether they can work with you comes through in your personality.
There’s a place for it – but it’s not in the areas of conflict I’ve described in this episode.
To me it’s a very distinct line – I hope after this episode,\ you now think it is too!
Go be you, and put on that CEO hat when you need to. You won’t regret it!
Need Some Help?
Handling boundaries, managing expectations, smoothing out conflict and other touchy things is something we can work on together in The Virtual Circle, my mastermind group for Virtual Assistants. Check it out at www.YourVAMentor.com/TVC (the virtual circle) – I bet it’s exactly what you need to run your VA business that much better.
If you need some help with putting on your business CEO hat, reach out to me at tracey@yourvamentor.com
I’ve helped hundreds of VAs through their challenges and got them on their way to growing their business through my private and group coaching. I’d love to do the same for you.
That’s all I’ve got for you this week, thanks for tuning in to learn to become a ridiculously good Virtual Assistant.